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Navigating Uncertainty: Supporting Neurodivergent Children in Distressing Times
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For many adults, uncertainty often arises from the information they encounter and their efforts to understand it. However, neurodivergent children frequently express their distress in different ways. Rather than through comprehension, their reactions manifest through feelings, such as sensing a parent’s tension, a disrupted bedtime, or changes in their routine. They might not fully understand complex issues like geopolitics, but they can perceive when the adults around them are uneasy.

The Emotional Climate and the 'Domino Effect'

When parents or caregivers of autistic, ADHD, and other neurodivergent children face such complexities—juggling their own fears while trying to maintain a sense of safety for their children who thrive on predictability and emotional stability—what can they do?

Experts indicate that during distressing times, it’s not just the news that troubles neurodivergent children; it’s the emotional atmosphere that surrounds it. For families striving to create stability, even minor changes can trigger a domino effect.

“Neurodivergent children typically process uncertainty and emotional signals more intensely than their peers. Even indirect exposure to fear or adult discussions about regional tensions can lead them to feel that the world is unsafe and unpredictable,” explains Zobia Amin, a clinical psychologist at RAK Hospital. “This unpredictability can heighten their agitation and result in regression.”

Identifying Signs of Regression and Distress

Regression can manifest in various ways. Some children may become more clingy or insecure, while others might experience disrupted sleep, nightmares, frequent meltdowns, or revert to previous behaviours. “They often have heightened sensory sensitivity,” Amin notes, adding that when adults struggle to regulate their own emotions, neurodivergent children tend to absorb that distress.

At Hopeful Steps, a pediatric therapy program in Dubai, pediatric therapist Somya Raina observes that these shifts are emerging in therapy sessions. “We’ve noticed subtle yet significant changes in some children over the past few days,” she says.

“In therapy, this translates to children seeking more physical reassurance and displaying signs of emotional dysregulation.” However, these reactions are not unusual. “It’s often a child’s way of processing the uncertainty around them.”

Literal Thinking and Sensory Overload

For autistic children, distress can be exacerbated by their literal interpretation of information. Amin highlights that many autistic children view news in concrete terms, making alarming news feel immediate and personal. “They perceive danger as directly affecting them,” she explains.

Children with ADHD may also find it challenging to divert their attention from distressing content. “They can become fixated and struggle to shift their focus away from distressing news once they’ve encountered it. Sudden uncertainty can overwhelm their regulatory systems more quickly than it does for neurotypical children.”

The Safety Net of Routine

This is why routine is crucial. For many neurodivergent children, routine serves as a safety net in uncertain times. “Routine provides a sense of predictability, which is processed as safety for neurodivergent children,” Raina explains.

“When there’s a sudden change, it may disrupt the child’s sense of control, leading to dysregulation, frequent meltdowns, irritability, and sometimes a temporary regression of skills. These behaviours are often stress responses rather than intentional actions,” she adds.

For parents, recognizing distress can be challenging, particularly with non-verbal or minimally verbal children. Anxiety may manifest in behaviour rather than words.

“When they’re distressed but can’t articulate it, their behaviour reflects what they’re experiencing,” Amin notes. This may involve increased repetitive movements, disturbed sleep, avoidance of preferred activities, aggression, self-injury, or the loss of previously acquired skills.

Decoding Behavioural Communication

Raina encourages parents to view behavioural changes as a form of communication. “Observing these patterns—what occurs before and after the behaviour—can help parents understand what their child might be trying to convey.”

This insight resonates with Rachel Jerry, an Indian mother in Dubai whose nine-year-old daughter Johanna, diagnosed with Rett Syndrome, is non-verbal. “We interpret her emotions through body language, facial expressions, and behavioural cues,” she explains.

“During times of heightened tension or frequent news alerts, we notice small, clear changes. She may become slightly restless, withdrawn, or less interested in activities she usually enjoys,” she adds.

Children like Johanna are highly responsive to the emotional atmosphere. “Even if they cannot fully comprehend the news, they can sense the energy around them. As parents, we become more observant during these times because their reactions often manifest not in words but through subtle behavioural changes.”

Creating a 'Sensory Safe' Home

At home, Jerry and her family prioritize consistency. “Our reassurance stems from routine and connection,” she adds. “We keep her daily schedule stable to help her feel safe and grounded.”

They also avoid exposing her to distressing visuals or heavy news discussions and instead engage in structured, sensory-friendly activities. “For Johanna, communication happens through visuals, gestures, music, and touch. Music therapy, in particular, aids her emotional regulation as music is her passion.”

Amin recommends creating a “sensory safe environment” with calming elements such as soft lighting, blankets, and favourite toys. Maintaining consistent waking, meal, and bedtime routines, utilizing visual schedules and timers, and remembering that “children regulate through adults” are also advised.

Raina similarly suggests practical home supports like emotion cards, reading time, breathing exercises, and movement-based activities. “Movement significantly aids in regulating the nervous system for both children and adults, facilitating stress release and promoting a calmer, more regulated mind.”

Fostering Familiarity and Flexibility

For some families, regulation arises from fostering familiarity. Mobashir Nazar, a Canadian parent of a child with autism, finds that returning to “something he loves,” along with therapy and outdoor activities, helps during overwhelming moments. “Engaging him in activities like visiting the park is beneficial,” he shares.

When schedules changed and school closures occurred, the family worked with their therapy center to adapt. “As parents, we strive to maintain normalcy, especially since the UAE government ensures we are well-informed,” he states.

Hafsa Qadeer, founder of ImInclusive, broadens the perspective, noting that invisible, situational, and neurological disabilities are among many forms of disability that may not be immediately visible and that no two individuals experience a condition identically.

“There’s no one-size-fits-all response, particularly in times of heightened uncertainty,” she adds. “In the workplace, employees may carry concerns that aren’t readily apparent, whether it’s caring for a family member with a disability, living with elderly relatives, or supporting loved ones with chronic anxiety or PTSD triggered by something as simple as a safety alert on their phone.”

Prioritizing Psychological Safety and Self-Compassion

For families with one or more disabilities, Qadeer believes prioritizing psychological safety is essential. “This may involve actively choosing environments and routines that support nervous system regulation, whether through hybrid work, remote work, or making choices that minimize stress and maintain calm in the household.”

It’s equally important for parents, many of whom are managing their own anxiety without letting it spill over. “The key message for parents is that they don’t need to be perfect,” says Amin. “They should view themselves as individuals with their own strengths, weaknesses, and fears.” Raina echoes this sentiment, emphasizing, “Children don’t need a perfect parent, but a regulated one.”

Evidence-Based Strategies for Parents of Neurodivergent Children

  • Create a sensory safe environment by limiting exposure to news, even in the background.

  • Establish a calming space with quiet elements and comforting sensory tools like blankets, soft lighting, and favourite toys.

  • Reduce exposure to loud or graphic media.

  • Stay calm and composed in front of the children.

  • Maintain routines as much as possible, including consistent waking, meal, and bedtime schedules.

ALSO READ

  • What do I tell my child?: UAE parents face tough conversations at home

  • UAE doctors offer useful tips on coping with stress and anxiety

  • Doomscrolling all night? Here’s why you can’t stop and how to break the loop

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